Exercise 08 · Full guide · Identity
Disability Lineage Letters.
You are not the first. You won’t be the last.
The client places themselves in a line of disabled people, past and future, and writes letters across it: to someone who came before, a reply in their voice, and a letter to someone who will come after. It counters isolation and builds disability identity and pride.
1Why this exercise exists
Many disabled people grow up as the only disabled person in their family, school or workplace, or the only one with their particular condition. Unlike many other minority identities, disability often isn’t shared with parents, so there’s no one at home to pass on stories, humour, survival skills or pride.
Isolation can make disability feel like a private misfortune rather than part of a shared history. It can also mean the only stories available are medical or tragic.
Lineage Letters makes a different history visible. Disabled people have always existed: in families (sometimes hidden), in history, in activism, in art. Writing across that line can change “I’m the only one” into “I’m part of something”.
2The thinking behind it
Disability identity
Research on disability identity, including Carol Gill’s influential model (1997) and Forber-Pratt and colleagues’ work (2017), describes how identity often develops through contact with other disabled people and disability culture, moving from isolation towards belonging and, for some, pride. Lineage Letters offers a version of that contact, even when real-world community isn’t available yet.
Hidden histories
Disabled people have often been hidden: in institutions, in family silence, in records written by others. Recovering a lineage is partly an act of reclaiming. Disability history includes people who were sent away, and people who fought for rights still in use today, such as the campaigners behind independent living.
Why letters
Letter-writing is used in many therapies (narrative, grief, compassion-focused) because it slows thinking down, allows voices that can’t be spoken face to face, and leaves something the client can keep. Writing the reply in another person’s voice draws on imagination in a similar way to empty-chair work.
3What it looks like in a session
Fictional example Ciarán, 22, has a rare genetic condition and recently found out a great-uncle had “something similar” and spent his life in an institution.
Nobody ever talked about him. My mum only found out last year.
Would you want to write to him? Only if it feels right.
I’d tell him I’m at university. That I have a PA. That I’m not hidden.
And what would he say back?
…Maybe that he’s glad. And angry. And to not let them shut me away either.
Ciarán writes the reply over the following week. He decides not to share it with his family yet, but adds a disabled rights activist and two online friends to his lineage tree, and says for the first time that he feels “in a line, not at the end of one”.
4How to run it
Ask first, and agree a time limit. Remind the client they can stop at any point, shorten it, or take the rest home.
- 5 minutes
Find your lineage
List or draw: disabled relatives (named or never named), historical figures, activists, writers, online community, people you’ve met. Connection doesn’t have to be by condition.
“Who are the disabled people, known or unknown, who came before you?”
Why: Real relatives are optional. Chosen lineage counts fully.
- 8 minutes
Write to an ancestor
Tell them what your life is like now: what has changed and what hasn’t.
“What would you want them to know about your life?”
- 5–8 minutes
Write their reply
What would they say back? What would they be proud of, or warn you about?
“If they could answer, what would they say?”
Why: Imagined replies often carry permission or strength the client struggles to give themselves.
- 5–8 minutes
Write to a future disabled person
A child not yet born, or someone newly diagnosed in 20 years. What do you want them to know?
“What do you want the next person to know?”
Why: This places the client as an ancestor too.
Reflection prompts
- Where did you first see someone like you?
- What do you carry from those who came before?
- What would you like to pass on?
5Adapting it
| If… | Try |
|---|---|
| Family history holds hidden shame or institutions | Go slowly; choose historical or chosen ancestors instead. |
| Writing is hard | Voice notes, a single sentence, or the therapist scribes. |
| No known disabled people in the client’s life | Offer to explore disability history or writers together first. |
| Young people | Write to a disabled hero, or to a future younger child. |
| Groups | Build a shared lineage tree; read future letters aloud if people want. |
6Through different approaches
The exercise sits inside most ways of working. What changes is what you do with what comes up.
Narrative
Thicken an alternative story of belonging, and recruit an audience to it.
“Who else belongs in this story?”
Compassion-focused
Use the ancestor’s voice as a compassionate other.
“What would they say to you on a hard day?”
Identity-affirming
Support movement towards disability identity and pride, at the client’s pace.
“What does it mean to you to be part of this lineage?”
Gestalt
Use the reply as a dialogue, giving voice to an absent other.
“Speak as them. What do they want you to hear?”
Psychodynamic
Explore family silence and what was passed down unspoken.
“What was never said about disability in your family?”
Systemic
Look at how the family has told, or hidden, disability across generations.
“How has your family talked about difference?”
7Signs it’s helping, and when to hold back
Signs it’s helping
- Less “I’m the only one”.
- The client names at least one disabled person they feel connected to.
- Curiosity about disability history or community.
- Pride, or something near it, appears.
- Family silence becomes something to talk about.
When to hold back
- Family history can hold institutions, abuse or loss. Go slowly and keep real relatives optional.
- Don’t push identity labels the client doesn’t use.
- Don’t over-romanticise ancestors; they can be complicated.
- If the client isn’t ready to connect with disability as identity, respect that.
8Printable worksheet
My disability lineage · Date: __________
My lineage
Dear ___________ (someone who came before)
Their reply
Dear future disabled person
9Evidence & sources
- Research findingGill, C. J. (1997). Four types of integration in disability identity development. Journal of Vocational Rehabilitation, 9(1), 39–46.
- Research findingForber-Pratt, A. J., Lyew, D. A., Mueller, C., & Samples, L. B. (2017). Disability identity development: A systematic review of the literature. Rehabilitation Psychology, 62(2), 198–207.
- Established conceptWhite, M., & Epston, D. (1990). Narrative Means to Therapeutic Ends. Norton. (Letter-writing in therapy.)
- Established conceptOlkin, R. (1999). What Psychotherapists Should Know About Disability. Guilford Press.
- Our frameworkDisability Lineage Letters is this site’s own tool, not a validated measure.
- Not yet knownIt hasn’t been tested as an intervention.
Related: Shame, Difference and Belonging · Internalised Ableism · Rewriting the Script · All eleven exercises